It's now January 1st 2018. This past month has been one of the biggest pushes of my life, with the exception of moving here to Haida Gwaii.
No one likes to admit when they have made mistakes, or could do better. There's always something to work harder at, something to fix, something to take care of. In fact being responsible for myself and my ideas is a pretty exhausting job.
The stress of growth is almost unbearable some days.
Running into problems in the bakery momentarily leaves me feeling like it would be better to give up and just feed us.
I think of all the people who don't get to enjoy good food because they have similar issues to mine, and I choose to stand back up and work through the growing pains of the bakery. Facing the new challenges head on with new understanding, and ideas.
I choose to take accountability for my mess and accept that it not only clutters my living space but my thinking space too. I also recognize that progress can not be made on projects, or anything else for that matter, while my mess looms.
Taking accountability for life's obstacles gives me the fuel to push through the pain of change and strive to be different tomorrow than I was today. By making commitments to myself to achieve my goals I can overcome the desire to procrastinate, and shape my world to be the world I want to live in.
Live Life to the fullest,
It's been a year since my last entry. Time goes by, often without much thought. I find myself constantly striving towards the never ending list of things that need to be done, that daunting pile of “to do's” that seem to accumulate more than they get achieved.
All these “to do's” tend to run my life. There are days I run away from my “to do's” and days I run into them.
Today I decided to stand still and admire what we have done, even for minute.
Far too often I find myself eating the food we have worked so hard to provide, way too fast and not enjoying the quality that we take so much time to ensure. I'm so focused on getting the next “to do” off my list that enjoying what we have done seems like an equally challenging task.
For this reason I have decided to give myself space in the morning to write again. Writing was, in a sense, the method I used to reflect on, and appreciate what we have managed to accomplish so far.
I can't promise myself that writing will slow down my eating habits or help me take the time throughout the day to enjoy our progress more, but I can promise myself the time to reflect and share our accomplishments.
Live life to the fullest
Haida Gwaii has been our home now for 3 months and everyday we take another tiny step towards a subsistence lifestyle. As we start to recover from the trauma of the rat race our energy and motivation return, although far from fully recovered I can feel the bubbling spring of life welling up inside me again. With that energy Brent and I decided to leave the island and find the next tool we need to live off the land, or should I say ocean.
For those of you who know us, you'll know that Brent has a particular passion for boats. His passion for boats extends to his passion for sea food and the art of bringing it home to feed his family. This passion is in fact what brought us to Haida Gwaii to begin with.
Hi, I'm Cyndi Bird, hobby homesteader, aspiring writer, amature photographer, art and craft enthousiast and wanna be cook.